I spoke about labels
in my profile. What has had me thinking a
lot about the subject lately is trying to come up with name or phrase that
sums up my relationship with Cancer.
A year ago I was
feeling great when within one weeks time I was diagnosed with Kidney Cancer and
operated on to remove my left kidney. A few
weeks later I was out with my husband in our little town when an acquaintance
asked me what had happened. I replied, “well
supposedly I had cancer.” Supposedly? I laughed at myself, we all laughed. Talk about denial!
Now I’m facing
another go around with cancer. It has
spread to my lung and I’m scheduled for surgery on Wednesday to remove my right
upper lobe (lung.)
Surely I’m
grateful the label cancer “victim” is out of fashion. No one wants to be victim but I’m too much of
a pacifist to call myself a “fighter” or “warrior.” If I end up dying an old woman of something completely unrelated to cancer, only then do I feel I could be labeled a "survivor.”
So what then? What makes sense to me? If one must come up with a name for it…I’ll
call myself a cancer “alive-er.” I’m
alive now, and as we all have said, but is often hard to do… I’ll try
to remember to enjoy life and treat every day as precious.
